====== The Post-Wendy's Saga ====== The **Post-Wendy's Saga** is the part of Boglim History spanning between fall 2016 and February 2017, and is named such for the time directly after Josh's termination from his job at Wendy's. This saga is extremely dense for content, as this includes Josh's first sex doll, numerous spurts of popularity, the introduction of many notable homeboys, and important incidents that would define the YouTube presence of KingCobraJFS. ===== Characters Overview ===== ==== Major Characters ==== ***[[characters:KingCobraJFS]]:** Cobes has found a new low. No girl, no job, no money - Josh is at his wits' end. ***[[characters:Homeboy Scotty]]:** Ever the persistent wing man, Scotty would continue to try setting up girls for Josh, and help him job hunt. ==== Minor Characters ==== ***Castellus Zemi:** Castellus Zemi was the troll responsible for the summary firing of Josh via numerous complaint emails to Wendy's International. He is also fat, and short. ***[[characters:Alex Anderson]]:** A fan favorite homeboy, Alex would make his first appearance this saga. ***[[characters:Darflinny]]:** Darf would take Josh shooting during this saga, and would start to make appearances more often. ***Tina:** Homeboy Scotty's surprisingly masculine-looking girlfriend. ***[[characters:Jeremy Rogers]]:** Rasta Man would make his official video debut this saga, adorned with his signature Rastafarian cap. ***[[characters:Scrapper Steve]]:** Scrapper Steve would show up briefly to assist Josh during his unemployment by bringing him on with odd jobs. ***Jonathan Banks:** Shows up in the same video as Rasta Man Rogers. Made fun of Josh's attempt to hide his early-onset baldness, and a Casper local who made odd-ball content and videos where he danced to dubstep, which was the style at the time. ===== Set Up ===== Following the constant catfishing of Homeboy Scotty, Josh has had a formal complaint lodged at Wendy's Corporate about his videos by fat manlet Castellus Zemi, in an attempt to troll Josh. This would be disastrous for Josh, as there are few places willing to take a person as filthy as Josh on such short notice, and even less in Casper, WY. ===== Key Events ===== ==== "People need to stop harassing me" ==== August 21st, 2016: Josh would release a video detailing his manager speaking to him about the allegations levied to corporate, which Josh would categorically deny. Castellus Zemi, under the impression that Josh handled food, and was not simply a lobby attendant(AKA a short-order janitor). This has remained a point of debate, but does not discount the fact that Castellus is short and fat. Despite his best efforts, Josh would be let go from Wendy's, and would announce this a short few days later in the video "I lost my job becauce(sic) of internet trolls", three days later. This would be a major gut-punch for Josh, as he had been working at Wendy's for over five years at this point, even if he was only working a few hours a week. ==== Amnesty ==== The news of Josh's major loss was a shot heard around the Cobraverse. As a result, many cobros, cobra demons, cobra angels, and troles alike would unite in their morbid curiosity and appreciation of The Boy, sending him gifts and financially supporting him through this trying time. Castellus Zemi, the fat manlet, would be righteously savaged by the fangs of King Cobra's followers. His old workplace would be harassed, he would be doxxed, and regardless of his attempts to defend his actions, no amount of deleted videos would soothe the savage beasts. Despite the human/dwarf hybrid's attempt to blame Josh for his own firing, his cries would fall on deaf ears. Much of Zemi's videos are now lost to the aether, a stark reminder that a cobra's venom is more than just a small prick and a little bit of dribble.\\ Fans would create an online petition to get Josh reinstated at Wendy's, which did as well as any online petition does. ==== Rehabilitation ==== A few weeks later, Josh would speak with a job rehabilitation center, in an attempt to once again achieve gainful employment. With his NEET status returning to him, Josh would spend much of his free time chilling with Homeboy Scotty, as well as Darflinny B, Michael Baldwin, shooting some guns with the latter.\\ This would also be the advent of ExhumedVision's numerous KingCobraJFS merchandise runs, beginning with some themed mugs, and new T-shirts. ==== Meet Alex, and meat beat as well ==== ^{{:sagas:josh_finally_destroys_some_pussy.png?nolink&400 |}}| |//Above: Josh violently destroys pussy on camera//| New Homeboy [[characters:Alex Anderson]] would make his debut in the background of one of Josh's innumerable Drink Reviews. While the meeting of Alex and Josh will remain a mystery lost to time, Alex would rapidly become a fan favorite.\\ After being sent a fleshlight in the mail by a supporter, Josh would once again question his attraction to women, and would consider giving up on sex and companionship, discussing it further in the aptly named video, "Im giveng up on sex and companionship". He would further elaborate on his now year-long dry spell by admitting he doesn't even want a sex doll any more. Josh would go on to destroy the fleshlight on camera with a pair of scissors, seemingly close to tears as he cut it. Red in the face, Josh would say he appreciated the gesture, but had given up on sex. And companionship. Josh would later admit to using the fleshlight before destroying it. He would attempt to fix it, after supposedly feeling remorse for his actions, as the fan who sent it had stuck up for him against The Haters. ==== The Silicone Maiden ==== Josh would start a second GoFundMe for a sex doll. Unsurprisingly, this would be similarly disastrous to his first attempt, with the added humiliation of local Casper news site, K2 Radio, on top of having it deleted. This article regarding the sex doll, sadly, remains another piece of Lost Boglim Media. At first, Josh was kind of pissed that it had been taken down, and said as much in his video "My godundme was flaged and taken down", but ultimately came to his senses about the entire affair. For now. ==== Inspection time ==== On September 20th, The Cobra Lair(Josh's apartment) underwent an inspection by his landlord. Josh spends many weeks leading up to the inspection preparing and reassuring his viewers that he will pass with ease. He ultimately passes the inspection, but the landlord makes comments about his sink being "disgusting" and suggests easing off the tobacco use. Josh then does an unboxing with $80 worth of pipe tobacco to celebrate, his ODD kicking in upon hearing the tobacco use comment. ==== Fan interaction ==== Josh and Homeboy Scotty would join a Discord server by the name of The Cobra Cult, and would start hanging out and interacting with fans and trolls on a regular basis. Josh would often forget he was in a chatroom, and would spend hours unknowingly broadcasting himself laughing at cartoons he was watching. Scotty would advertise hangouts before time in order to garner more attention. Scotty and Josh would also start experimenting with the synthetic weed known as [[objects:Spice]], and although they would never do it on camera, they would allude to using it in conversation during later videos. Concerned for Josh's well-being, fans would convince him that smoking spice makes your Cobra Jr. smaller by means of a fake news website, to great success. \\ Josh would also release several response videos to Castellus Zemi's anti-cobra vids, referring to Zemi as "fat fuck" and constantly mocking his physique. \\ The Floral Throne would show signs of wear and tear at this time in the armrests, which Josh would duct tape over. ==== The fake documentary(not that one) ==== In late autumn of 2016, a documentary about former adult video actor Sean Paul Lockhart by the name of "King Cobra" would be released. Seizing the opportunity and knowing of Josh's paper-thin ego, especially when it came to masculinity, fans would attempt to connect his name to the documentary in any way possible, leading to the video "the film called king cobra is not about me" on October 2nd, 2016. ==== The BC Rich Guitar Smashing Incident ==== //for a play-by-play of this heartbreaking moment, check out [[incidents:b.c_rich_guitar_smashing_incident|the associated Incidents page.]]// The very next day on October 3rd, 2016, Josh would get his grubby little mitts on 5 bottles of Sprite Tropical Remix - His favorite soda from his teenage years. As the drink had stopped being made in 2005, the soda was expired, which Josh would only realize after drinking it(As the Boy's constitution had not yet been molded by the rock'n'roll lifestyle). After becoming more depressed talking about [[beliefs:gender|gendur relayshuns]], and more enraged after eating a burger of some form, Josh would do the unthinkable: He took his BC Rich Guitar, the guitar he had toiled endlessly for by means of a paper route in high school, and in a manic rage smashed it live on camera. This was most certainly not what was up, and many fans mourned the loss of such an important cultural icon in the weeks to come. \\ This mood would continue for several days, as Josh would be informed that his great-grandmother had passed away 3 months prior, and nobody had bothered to tell him. To add insult to injury, Clint would tell Josh he needs to wash his clothing more. He also makes a comment on Josh's Facebook wall concerning the destruction of his two electric guitars. In response, Josh blocks his dad from viewing his Facebook. ==== Illogical Contraptions ==== Josh's notoriety would expand to radio, netting him a spot on radio show Illogical Contraption. Similar to many other delusional lolcows, Josh would go in empty-handed and empty-brained, unaware that his host was routinely mocking him. \\ A few tidbits from this event include: * To a background of snickers and barely withheld laughs, the host would ask Josh what it felt like to be the best at YouTube, to which Josh would respond with ignorance. * The host asks Josh about his workout routine due to his impressive biceps. Josh tells the host that he does sets, but refuses to elaborate. ==== A monumental fumble ==== During this time, a fan would send Josh two tickets to see Insane Clown Posse, and Josh would go with Homeboy Scotty. Although Scotty claims he was going to hook Josh up with someone at the concert, this would come to pass. In perhaps what is the largest fumble in Josh's sad miserable pathetic life, a girl started dancing on him, but Josh thought she was just trying to move through the crowd, so he backed off. Despite this, Josh would overall say that he enjoyed the experience. ==== Getting rehired ==== At the end of the month, Josh would finally attempt to find another job. This would be a difficult task, even with the assistance of Homeboy Scotty and his girlfriend Tina. Josh would also help a pal haul scrap metal, a pal by the name of [[characters:scrapper steve|Steve.]] The job hunt would continue and Josh would update his fans with his woes involving online applications. \\ The Floral Throne would face Josh's wrath during a video in this period, as Josh took his anger out on the chair after he couldn't find his lighter. Perhaps if his lighter didn't go against the grain and stayed on the fucking desk, the throne may have survived a few more months weeks of abuse. While on lunch break with Scrapper Steve and his wife, Josh would be suggested to take a job at Taco Bell by an offscreen acquaintance of his. What would have happened if Josh hired on will remain a mystery, as the Boy would remain with Steve doing odd jobs for the time being. In early November, Josh would land an interview as a member of a restaurant as the dishwasher. ==== Attack of the troles ==== After releasing popular video "making cheasy pasta", Josh would start turning comments off on his videos, after an influx of troll comments. This would turn out to be an intelligent decision, as the following weeks Josh would announce his intention to vote for Republican nominee Donald Trump in the 2016 election, detailing h is thoughts in the aptly named "im voteing for trump" on November 6th, 2016. This would change after Josh was told that Gary Johnson would legalize marijuanna, and summarily changed his mind at the eleventh hour. During this time, Josh would also go deep into the hair care products in an attempt to save his rapidly decreasing hairline. ==== The Sex Doll Sub-Saga ==== On November 11, Josh would receive an unbelievable gift in the mail: A fan had sent him a sex doll. Despite not having a vaginal insert, and being second-hand, Josh would name her Alissa(Not dissimilar to Alicia, his high school oneitis) and would play the boglim rendition of the Star Spangled Banner to her. \\ Josh would post later that his apartment had been broken into, but only Alissa had been stolen. This was a lie, as Josh had taken a knife to her and viciously dismembered her, leaving her body parts in a dumpster. This lie was a bust from the start, as Josh claimed he had woken up at 6 AM to go job hunting, when everyone knew he woke up no earlier than 10 AM. Josh would keep this blatant lie going for as long as he could before eventually cracking, and admitting to getting mad and breaking it in a tard rage. As a last-ditch effort, Josh would claim that he had ripped Alissa while having sex with it, which would have been impossible due to the lack of vaginal implant. Eventually, Josh would back out of this excuse, say that he thought the sex doll was a trolling attempt, and try to move on. Josh went viral as a result of this sub-saga, and would re-enable comments on his videos to boost viewer engagement by any means necessary.\\ ==== Return of the King ==== Josh would receive a 7-day ban on Facebook due to posting a scantily clad woman. This would enrage Josh, but would spend his time away from social media finding a job. Josh would announce that he had an interview at an undisclosed location, to no success. Minutes before his interview, Josh would break his glasses once again and attempt to fix them with gothic black tape. Josh would get his glasses fixed the next day, and would go on a brief hiatus to go to a water park with his family for thanksgiving, where his family would give him an early Christmas present - None other than a replacement BC Rich Warlock, and a spell book to aid in his spell casting. ==== The iMac starts acting cute ==== Josh would lose his temper and punch his computer, causing damage to his treasured iMac at the corner of the screen. Josh would break the screen further after attempting to demonstrate how he damaged his screen, knocking his phone off the charger in the process of making a gesture of communication(ACTUAL WORDS SPOKEN). Furthermore, this spergout was now firmly broken, meaning that Josh would have to beg for a new computer. Josh would carry on his e-begging into December, making a short video with new homeboy, [[characters:Jeremy Rogers|Jeremy "Rasta Man" Rogers]], when he attempted to hide his balding hair by shaving devil horns into his widow's peak. This would be instantly mocked by non-homeboy Jonathan Banks, saying it made him look like an old man. Josh was NOT amused by this jest at his expense, the advice given on his hair, or the fact that Jonathan could out-British him, and Jonathan would not appear much in videos from hereon out.\\ Josh's iMac would finally spark its last in mid-December, and Josh would maintain content frequency by making videos where he would wander around outdoors. This style of content would become massively popular, as there's few things more entertaining than a boglim attempting to integrate with modern society. ==== Enjoy being blocked on Facebook, Stalker Child ==== In case you were wondering whether or not Josh still loved his high school crush Alicia too much, we have the answer: In mid to late December, Josh would tell his fans to donate to a GoFundMe to help out Alicia's father Todd, as they were in financial crisis. Despite telling his fans to donate, Josh would not, saying that he was broke. Alicia's family would take the GoFundMe down after Josh's Troles set their sights on the page. Furious, Josh would delete the video linking to the page and make a video explaining why he did so. \\ ==== Losing friends and follicles ==== Later that month after getting tipsy, Josh would "speak his mind" about his distaste for Homeboy Scotty's incessant wing-manning. Although Josh would keep it intentionally vague, he wouldn't be vague enough. \\ Furthermore, in defiance of his own physiological state, Josh would release a video titled "Im not loosing my hair" where he attempted to prove his trolls wrong about the state of his hair. In the video, Josh would "prove" his claims by stating that his hair was growing back and, inexplicably, flexing his muscles. ==== A very Cobra (anti)Christmas ==== Just before Christmas, Josh would post the video "Working on my next album" where he would drunkenly ramble about his next album, as well as some choice comments from the late KingCobraJFS subreddit. Josh was furious over comments about his musical talent, and would proudly announce that he had made a whopping //**six dollars and thirty cents**// off his six albums. He would carry on to say that his hair was growing back(false). \\ Josh would take a brief trip to Arizona over the holidays to spend time with his grand-parents, where he would make numerous Facebook posts detailing his personal abilities with guitar, his sexy hot looks, and the fact that ladies were practically fighting to sleep with him. Josh would also disclose getting a bottle of his favorite alcohol, Jack Daniels Honey, and immediately dropping it afterwards. Since this monumental loss, Josh's spirits would always be shattered around Christmastime, much like the bottle he lost on that fateful Idaho morning. \\ While Josh would neither go live or upload to YouTube, we would get two videos while he was in Arizona, saying that he believed employers should not be allowed to view their employees' social media accounts. While this is purely speculative, doubtless his sex doll posts made some prospective employers nervous about hiring him.\\ While in Arizona, Josh would attend his grandparents' memorial service, ringing a gigantic bell in honor of their memory. \\ Additionally, Homeboy Scotty would fabricate a lie about his nephew's Xbox being stolen, feeding it to Josh and starting a GoFundMe to attempt to garner some money. Most of the cobraverse was now extremely sick of Scotty, and as a result, the GoFundMe only ended up with a svelte $65.00 USD. ==== The beginning of the rebirth ==== Over his holiday break, Josh would become reinvigorated, and once again began to quest further towards his dream of becoming a rock star. He would create an Instagram(although he would eventually stop posting), suicide baited at the grand canyon although he would walk these statements back, and made the bold prediction that he would win the lottery in 2017. Unfortunately, much of Josh's content from this particular time surrounding his travel and grandparents was deleted without archival, as Josh would begin his next saga soon after.\\ In January, 21 out of the 27 videos made would survive the rebirthing process, with the remaining archived six being archived just in time. Of those 21, moments of importance would include Josh unboxing a Joy Davidson shirt(a gag from when Josh said the band name Joy Division wrong) and advertising new shirts of his own doing, with images freshly ripped from Google Images. Of the remaining videos, one would be of Josh exploring the website, Real Love Sex Dolls, and making his own custom sex doll in painstaking detail, in hopes that a fan would spend $2,400 to purchase it for him. That February, a fan by the name of Vapor would do just that and send Josh a slightly used sex doll, which he re-christened [[objects:Fun Sized Felicia]], which only sounds similar to Alicia by pure coincidence. Josh would then pantomime Felicia and [[objects:Uncle Shon the dummy|Shon]] at the same time on video. This would be one of the few videos that survived the Rebirth from February, although not much else was made that month apart from some videos of Scrapper Steve's dogs. \\ Josh would start his rebirth with the divisive "The reason i deleted my video", where the audio corrupted and repeated the same second of sound for the entire video. Why he deleted the video, nobody will ever truly know, as Josh would appear in the video shirtless, and smoking a pipe while saying...Something. \\ The Post-Wendy's Saga would officially end on the 24th of February, 2017, when Josh deleted every video on his channel, and began [[sagas:The Rebirth Saga]]. ===== Conclusion ===== The Post-Wendy's Saga is evocative of peak KingCobraJFS content: Josh wasn't afraid to leave his dwelling, he had innumerable friends, trolls to wage war with, and had too much time on his hands. This saga would be remembered for being a time where content was fresh and consistent, and to this day between dry spells, many fans will speak of this saga as a halcyon age where the milk flowed freely. {{page>:blurbs#The KingCobraJFS Story}}