The best way to describe Josh's method is to say that he cooks like a dog would likely cook. With next to no understanding or knowledge of what he's doing, but equipped with unrelenting determination and some fleeting confidence.

Cooking has always been an important part of Cobraverse, but especially in recent years, next to gender relations and farting into his camera, it became one of the most important outlets for the boy to communicate with his fans.

Although often referred to as 'cooking', what Josh does (aside from molesting whatever kitchen appliance he decides to use) is merely assembling random ingredients together, before blasting them in oven, or as a rare treat in a pan. Occasionally the boy manages to do something that could be on a good day considered cooking, but the result is almost certainly inedible, so it doesn't matter anyways.

It would seem that cobes has recognized that, and moved from “Cooking with Cobra” to the ominous “Food Hacks” - if you read that, and had no idea what kind of a person Josh is, you could possibly expect modifications of famous recipes, making them more convenient, cutting corners while making most of it, etc. Well, throw that out of the window (after Puff), because Jorp's idea of a “food hack” is to hack together bunch of crap, Epic Meal style, except imagine a dirty unwashed autist, too stupid to use knife and fork, and you get a decent idea of what kind of biohazard we end up with. Some people speculate that given the boy's diet, switching to normal food would kill him at this point.

Josh building the Tower of Babel out of sandwiches

It's impossible to list every noteworthy meal the bad kitchen boy has cooked over the course of years, as there are probably hundreds of examples, here are at least some of the most infamous food crimes achievements:

The Bedbug Burrito - The key to getting extra protein into your day old bogrrito is to leave it sitting out for all the bedbugs to enjoy. Seeing the boy crunch on actual bugs (that are trying to desperately hide within the rotting burrito) isn't for the faint of heart, doubtlessly one of the nastiest things Jorp has ever done. Some have accussed the boy of cannibalism, but his bugs ancestry has yet to be proven.

Candy Calzone - Dankness is on the way in this recipe as King Cobra assembles a crazy candy calzone. The sweetness of bananas, peanut butter, brown sugar, and chocolates playfully intermingling with the savory pizza flavors of pepperoni, bacon, and mozzarella is sure to be a hit at your next random party.

Cat Food Burger - What do you do when trolls send you cat food? End sickos by wolfing it down, of course! Jorp puts reverse psychology onto another level. Incredibly disgusting to humans, a tasty treat for a boglim. Probably the healthiest meal he has eaten in years. And he enjoyed it, as he scarfed it down without any hesitation.

Cheasy Pasta - Rev up the cauldron and make “basically something to eat” with this classic recipe. The combination of mayo, ranch, mustard and two types of pasta powder (cheese and beef varieties) congeals quite nicely, even if you don't have beef to cook it in.

Cordinal Cherry Bacon Cheese Burger - Josh rants about how real the sticks his wands are made from as he stacks bacon, brown sugar, mozzarella, peanut butter, and cordial—or as Josh calls them, “cardinal”—cherries. This thick, greasy, and unhealthy burger is sure to draw your doctor's ire.

DANK Mac 'n' Cheese - How to make Mac 'N Cheese that looks like mashed potatoes that were already in somebody's stomach. From the comments: It pairs great with apple sauce, monster, canned salmon and dark rum. M’lord has the palette of a swamp rat.

Deep Frtd Avocados - The boogerman (not to be mistaken with boogeyman) sets up to reduce innocent pieces of avocado into pile of ash. The dankness is strong with this one, the end result looks more like a pile of oysters than avocados, but has that chrunch 'n munch.

Fiery Fish Pizza - Cobra cooks up a pizza sure to separate the men from the boys. Josh is unable to complete the challenge and becomes violently ill from the pizza. The cooking portion of this meal has been lost, however the recipe was listed in the Bitesize upload as “Pre-made pizza dough, four different Primo seasonings, Swampadelic, eight Taco Bell hot sauce packets, cheese, pepperoni, hot sauce soaked sardines, Doritos, giardiniera and curly fries”.

Genetic Mowden Dew Eggs - Do you like hard boiled eggs? Did you know you can 'reduce' them, like you would reduce a sauce while cooking a normal meal? Fear not, the Iron Bog will teach you the ways.

Potato "Fries" - Josh cuts up some potatoes into large chunks that no sane person would mistake for fries, and thanks to his expert skills and some grease fire, almost burns his old apartment down. “The warlock's bubbling cauldron spewed forth its black ichor as he sang his curses into the night.”

Sushi Bacon Cheeseburger - The perfect amount of bacon, swiss, mozzarella, and de-thawed frozen sushi get micawaved to perfection then topped with wasabi. Pairs well with a Marlboro NXT and an ice cold Mountain Dew Pitch Black. Not to be confused with the Sushi Baconator.

Sushi Baconator - Cobes waxes circularly about unhealthy habits while waiting for the sushi atop his Pretzel Baconator (hold the ketchup, extra cheese) de-thaws. This crazy sandwich also gets loaded up with Flaming Hot Queso Doritos Dinamitas, Franks Red Hot, soy sauce, and wasabi. Not to be confused with Sushi Bacon Cheeseburger.

Sushi Pizza - Do you really want to ask?

Boglim being hypnotized by the micahwave

Every cook worth their pound of salt has a special technique. Cobra of course has his. Warning: Following boy's methods can lead to a very early death. So can actually cooking or eating any of his creations. Not recommended for the individuals of non-boglim species.

• 420 and 666 - Josh knows stove and oven are his bitches, and doesn't believe in wasting any time - he almost always sets an appliance at the highest possible temperature, likely due to belief that 'laws of thermodynamics' means 'I like hotdogs' in Spanish, and expects the food to simply cook faster. Basically, the boy operates on video game logic.
• Low and slow - Needs to be witnessed to believe - if there is one dish that cannot in any way benefit from being cooked on “low and slow”, it's pasta. Normal person puts pasta in boiling water and cooks it according to the instructions on the package. A master cooks the pasta for over an hour, reducing it into mushy water.
• Saving up the grease - Grease is to boglims what water is to humans. Not just a necessity to survive, but also a replacement for beauty industry - cooking oil can be used to style your hair, or lube up your hat, so that it can fit over your massive gourd.
• Extra bacon, extra cheese, yesssh please - Aka taking a dish of some sort and covering it in so much shit that you not only can't tell what it's supposed to be, but whenever it's even supposed to be a food, or turd on a plate.
• I'll eat it later - Letting your food go cold and eating it next day while leaving it unrefrigerated, TMDWU. Eating anything too hot or cold is for heathens that don't properly care for their teeth. Boglims know how to keep their teeth strong and healthy by only eating room temperature customized slop.
• Cans in fridge - Always keep your ingredients fresh! Josh is a trailblazer, and if you think leaving cooked food on a counter overnight isn't too reasonable, he'll make you eat your words (the only safe thing he'll make you eat), when you realize that Josh likes to store canned food in his fridge. For what reason, the expert bogologists cannot determine yet, but it is speculated that if this mystery gets explained, it could lead to solution for world hunger.
• Drunk as a skunk - Worst mistake you can ever make is to start cooking while sober. Don't you dare opening the fridge (where you store the cans, obviously), until you start seeing double at the very least. If you want to have a more scientific methodology to determine how drunk is drunk enough - keep drinking until you forget how to use a can opener. Then you can start cooking.
• Playing with your food - What's the point of cooking, if you don't have some fun with it? Endlessly poking into your food is just a way to add some much needed entertainment to otherwise serious and by the numbers process. Recommends 8 out of 10 toddlers. That's what's up!
• Opening cans - Those pesky cans are bane of Cobra's existence, right after those fucking trolls! Josh is too stupid to understand how to operate can opener, so resorts to the tried and proven method since caveman times - if you just happen to be a missing link that doesn't have access to advanced tools, just adopt simpler tools like knives and hammers. That way, your tin can ends up looking like it had an encounter with Jason Voorhees. With Josh's legendary dexterity, it is a miracle the boy hasn't seriously injured himself over the course of years.

Cooking with Cobra is well known for it's use of innovative camera angles

Every kitchen gourmet has their favorite ingredients that they can always rely on. Chef John of the Food Wishes fame enjoys a little bit of cayenne in almost every meal. John Townsend uses nutmeg in many of his classic meals. Josh of course has a set of ingredients that make a foundation of what makes his “dishes” stand out from the rest of those hacks.

Josh is well supplied by his loving family, which regularly buys him groceries for his nasty experiments 'food hacks', and over the course of years has used many exotic ingredients in combinations that no chef has ever thought before. For some reason, the boy seems to be allergic to almost all kinds of vegetables (perhaps doesn't want to engage in cannibalism), as they rarely appear in his dank hacks.

• Bacon - Like a middle aged man stuck in the 2000's, Josh forms parts of his identity out of videos he has seen more than a decade ago. These days, nobody bats an eye over a piece of bacon, but if you remember the days of Epic Meal Time being big on Youtube (dark days, but life was simple), bacon was everywhere. So the boy, exposed to videos with manly men, doing manly things, assumed that in order to be a real man, one must eat bacon, preferably in every meal, whenever it makes sense or not. Plus, extra grease! These days, Josh is too lazy to even cook his own bacon, so instead tells his caretakers to buy him a nasty abomination called Bacon Bits.
• Beer/Soda - Josh enjoys splashing a bit of beer or soda into his food as it cooks to infuse it with the flavor of Bud Light, Mountain Dew, or whatever he's sippin' on.
• Cheese - If you don't cover your meal in so much cheese that you can't even see the original meal, are you even cooking? Your food is for pussies, unless you add double the amount of calories worth of cheese. Important part of any American household's diet.
• Doritos - Josh loves to add Doritos to his foods to add “that crunch, that munch” to his culinary creations.
• Grease - One of Josh's favorite ingredients is Country Crock, which he affectionately calls “butter”. The boy lives in grease, has been born out of grease, was molded by it and will die by it, so it's only natural that a cheap and unhealthy fat is his best friend in the kitchen. Essential part of most of the iconic recipes, has to be in any serious kitchen.
• Payne County Rust, Tony Chachere's, Slap Ya Mama - Payne County Rust is a barbecue seasoning for use on steaks and burgers. Tony's and Slap Ya Mama are two roughly similar cajun seasonings that are intended for use on a wide variety of foods to add a cajun kick to them. Josh reaches for this holy trinity of seasoning blends frequently.
• Sal-gur - A Cobra proprietary blend of salt and sugar